Footballer, passionate photographer, and I like to think about topics that feel essential to me, while trying to find an open consciousness along the way. Here are a few thoughts about me and a small introduction to the topics that occupy my mind.
I grew up in a small neighbourhood in Potsdam, where gardens between the houses connected me with my friends. Where school was a 5-minute walk away and the football pitch a 5-minute bike ride. I grew up in a family where both parents are doctors, where education is a duty and something taken for granted. I grew up without financial worries, with a lot of love and trust. I grew up without pressure to do certain things, and with the freedom to decide what sparks my passion.
Football woke up my joy, and together with the time I spent with my friends, it became my hobby. I played for years at a medium level, and I was one of the better players, but rarely the best in the team. For a club whose first team played in the third division at most. I saw players and friends move to better clubs and come closer to the dream of becoming a professional. I saw hundreds of boys my age at tournaments who were better than me. But deep inside me there was such a big belief and trust in myself that one day I would become one of the best footballers in the world. This belief and trust were probably a bit unrealistic, but they kept the fire and the will alive to keep going. At 15, I bet on myself and believed in myself, and I applied online for a trial through an app. I even faked my statistics, because it was my only way to get a trial at an academy. …
… I was accepted, and I met people who believed in me the way I believed in myself. I met people who even thought I could play Bundesliga football. It was the first time someone said it out loud in front of me. This filled my belief with so much energy that I worked hard, and through the trust of the people around me, I passed many others in those years.
On top of that, my body developed. To all the conditions and influences I mentioned, a level of endurance, sprinting ability and explosiveness was added that was made for top football. And that is where the belief and the dream of playing in the Premier League came from.
To grow up like this, to have such a stable environment, to meet people on the way who believe in you and support you, to have these kinds of physical abilities, is not normal. I am incredibly grateful to have one of the most privileged jobs in the world. I live an incredibly privileged life. A wonderful family that supports me, many friends and people around me who sacrifice so much so that I can live my dream.
And despite all of this, I carry insecurities, fears, anger and sadness inside me. The feeling of being alone. I keep asking myself what the reason for it is. And then I think of all the people who have harder situations. Who grow up in poverty, who grow up in other countries, who do not live in safety, who grow up with physical disabilities, who grow up with mental limitations, who are not given every opportunity.
And still, we are convinced to say: you just have to want it, and you will make it. I think that is wrong. Wanting alone is not enough to become a professional footballer. You need so many conditions and so much luck in life to be able to make it into the Premier League, or into any professional league at all. And still, we are sometimes convinced to deny other people their will and to put the responsibility on them for why they do not manage certain things. One thing is true, but so is the other: without the belief and the energy for something, you will never make it.
And yes, there were difficulties on my way too: moving out early, injuries, not playing and other things. But then I hear stories from teammates and people who went through completely different things and come from a different country, environment and different conditions, where it is simply admirable what they make out of it and how they grow, so that they can give their own children a different life.
Our world is full of envy, greed and hate. Love, understanding and support are getting lost, in my eyes. Many people can no longer keep their eyes open and expand their consciousness, when they are surrounded by things that numb their clear mind.
I have the dream that many more children can grow up the way I could, or in the way their own conditions allow, so that they can live an open, free and conscious life. Free from addictions like betting, gambling, drugs, food, pornography, social media. Filled with consciousness, love, trust, understanding and honesty for ourselves and for the people around us. So that we can build a world again where people in positions of responsibility value exactly these qualities and bring them into our world. So that we reduce inequality and trade our own greed for giving.
At this moment, I am convinced that a growing consciousness in society will bring us to the point where we can change things in a lasting way. We are trapped in a life full of influences that steal our time, our money and our consciousness, to make the super-rich an incredible amount of money. And that make us more and more dependent, and take away our clarity to see things and want to change them.
The topics I want to write about in my next texts are nutrition, consciousness, love and inequality. And things that cross my path, that I find access to, and where I have the feeling that my voice and my thoughts can inspire people.
I am on a journey of my own learning and of expanding my consciousness, and I am happy about every critical text and every feedback to my thoughts. About possible gaps you see, or areas where you discover potential. For now these are only words, but a first step to share something you think about, to get into exchange and maybe meet people who have similar visions.
